Everything Hurts

My Journey Into Photography

When I was 8, my parents gave me a Kodak Disk 4000 Camera for my birthday. I loved that camera, and took it everywhere with me, eventually driving my family crazy by constantly photographing them.

A few years later when I moved onto secondary school, the photography took a back seat for a while, only re-emerging again after I left university in 2000 having my own web design company. After we took on our first big client, I treated myself to a Sony Cybershot DSC-S70.

Once again, I fell in love with photography, although I never really understood the technical side. The camera was permanently set to “auto”, and I shared the photos, unedited, with my friends via the internet.

In 2007, I decided I wanted to learn more about photography, and I purchased my first SLR, a Canon EOS-400D.

To begin with, I shot anything that moved, and many things that didn’t. I soaked up photographic theory like a sponge & posted everything onto the popular photo sharing site, Flickr. Photography is often described as a bug, and it’s true; once you catch it, it’s hard to shake.

But the more I learnt, the more equipment I wanted. I quickly became obsessed with purchasing the best I could afford, hoping that it would improve my photography, but in reality all it did was leave me perpetually frustrated, dealing with the constant compromise and 2nd guessing myself at every opportunity.

Every single decision we make in photography is a compromise, some have to be made in a split second, while others can be agonised over for days or weeks.

Every lens we purchase is a compromise (cost/quality/features/weight). Every shot we take is a compromise (aperture/shutter speed/ISO noise). Even the cameras themselves are compromises (cost/quality/features/practicality/conspicuousness)

A top-of-the-range Nikon won’t get the candid shot that that requires a discreet compact, or naturally reproduce the sometimes unpredictable effects from toy cameras such as the Holga or Lomo. Even the decision between “should I tweak my camera settings now or should I take this shot before it’s too late” is a compromise.

It’s taken me three years to find peace with that constant compromise, and was one of the hardest lessons I’ve had to learn.

I also became frustrated with Flickr and the constant bombardment of photos I considered to be far better than my own. In the end, I deleted my photos from the site, moving them all to a photoblog under my own domain. I cut myself off from my community of friends on Flickr, effectively becoming a digital hermit. Somehow I got it into my head that having my own site would be far better than being on the same site as millions of other photographers.

I’ve always worked on the principle of trying to be photographically unique. To me, there’s nothing worse than taking a photo which could just as easily have been shot by someone else. It’s why you won’t see many shots of the moon, or landscapes in my work (ok there’s a few, but not many).

The photos I like most, are ones where I was the only person who could have taken that shot. People in unusual places or situations, abstract shots no-one else would have thought to take, single moments in time unique to me. I have always tried to develop my own distinctive style, but somehow in my head, being on Flickr was diluting that style. I thought that moving to my own website would improve things, but in reality the creative well dried up completely.

I was in a funk. I hadn’t picked up a camera in months and had lost faith in my own abilities. Even the constant desire for new camera gear had lulled.

Then, a few months ago I had a revelation. It was a thought which began its journey as a gentle gnawing at the back of my mind some months prior, but which had finally grown to the point where it could no longer be ignored.

The revelation was this:

Other people are producing amazing photographs from the most basic cameras. Some are highly technical, others clearly down to luck, but none require a costly investment in equipment. Maybe I don’t need more camera gear. Maybe I need less.

It was a simple piece by Ken Rockwell, entitled “Your camera doesn’t matter”, that had a profound effect on me and made me rethink much of my approach to photography. It was the pebble that started an avalanche.

Once I realised that beautiful photos didn’t require expensive equipment, I began to enjoy shooting again. It finally dawned on me that the very nature of photography itself is a both a compromise and a union between the technical and creative sides of the brain.

I began to shoot more hand-held shots, favouring high contrast, gritty, monochrome images, loaded with noise, technical imperfections, and most importantly, visual interest. I found myself using techniques at the polar opposite to those used in the ongoing quest for ‘tack sharp’. I also found myself having a growing distaste for the technique known as HDR. If anything, my photography was becoming LDR.

My relationship with photography went from extreme frustration to a zen-like state of enlightenment. I looked back through my library of approximately 5000 rejected shots and realised that too quick to dismiss many of them.

I sold off lots expensive camera gear including heavy tripods, large bags, expensive lenses and even my original Canon 400D which had become my spare camera.

Today, my camera bag contains just 5 items.

Canon EOS-50D

Sigma 10-20mm f/4-5.6

Canon s90

Professor Kobre Lightscoop & Manfrotto Modo Pocket

I wish I had realised 3 years ago that this was all I really needed, but I think I had to go through that painful process in order to reach the conclusion I did. Today, I love working within the limitations and restrictions of these simple tools, producing shots that I know other people will never be able to reproduce with all the money in the world, just because I was in the right time and place with this basic gear. I’ve reached an equilibrium with the eternal compromise.

In addition to the minimal gear in my camera bag, I also have an Nissin Di622 External Flash for occasional use and a Velbon CX Mini Tripod.

The point here, is that my camera equipment now takes up a small shelf in our spare room, instead of requiring the room itself and a separate insurance policy.

With the renewed interest in photography, came a renewed desire to share photos with others. A few days ago I posted 145 photos back onto a previously empty Flickr account. Some are reprocessed images from before, others are previously unseen. I’m sad that I lost so many nice comments from friends, but am looking forward to any new ones people are willing to make.

Contrary to conventional thinking, I’m actually much happier with a lot less stuff. It’s a philosophy I’m starting to apply to other parts of my life too. The old saying of less is more, couldn’t be more appropriate.

If you want to browse or comment on my photos, head on over to my photostream on Flickr.

Thanks for reading.

We’re Photographers, Not Terrorists

There are 4.3 million CCTV cameras spying on us here in the UK. That’s 20% of the worlds CCTV cameras, or to put it another way, 1 for every 14 residents. The average citizen is caught on camera 300 times a day.

Somehow we’ve allowed ourselves to be photographed more than any other country in the world. And yet, those of us who are photographers are harassed by building security guards and police officers at every opportunity.

Ask any photographer. We’re being made to feel that photography itself is a crime.

We’re told it’s to prevent terrorism, but as far as we know, photography has never been used in any terrorist attack. Ever.

Even if it had, do we seriously believe that terrorists would draw attention to themselves by using large and expensive SLR camera equipment, instead of something more inconspicuous such as a mobile phone?

Mobile phones are equipped with 8-10 megapixel cameras these days, and the images can be immediately emailed and deleted from the device. Wouldn’t that make more sense?

Besides, anybody can access detailed satellite photos and street level photography in almost any major city in the UK through Google Maps.

As for me personally, I’ve been questioned by the police for taking a photograph of my own house. I don’t live next to any buildings of great importance, just a suburban road full of houses in a small UK town. Furthermore, they cited prevention of terrorism, while interogating me.

This all-encompassing term, “prevention of terrorism”, has been used to justify some of the biggest encroachments on civil liberties in recent years. Every time you hear about terrorism on the news, you get just a little bit more scared. Fear in the population is good for governments. It eases the introduction of new laws such as America’s PATRIOT Act and the UK’s RIP Act.

Not a photographer? That changes nothing. This issue extends way beyond photographers rights into areas you do care about.

Drive a car? You should expect to be have your number plate photographed wherever you go. These cameras are currently used to track criminals, enforce congestion charging and monitor traffic flow. How long until this data can be accessed by private firms like insurance companies?

Maybe you’ve been on a plane recently? Then you already know what it’s like to be treated like a criminal. The endless searches, questions and pointless rules. Despite there only being 3 attempts in the last 8 years to commit acts of terrorism aboard commercial aircraft. The odds of being on on a plane involved in a terrorist incident during the past decade have been The Odds Of Airborne Terror accurately calculated to 1 in 10,408,947. For comparison, the odds of being struck by lightning are 1 in 576,000 which is around 20 times more likely.

A no-fly list which, at the time of 9/11 contained 16 names, now contains an estimated 1,000,000 names, and the cost of the program is approximately $1 billion to date. A huge number of false positives and abuses have been reported, many of which border on the ridiculous, and yet the whole thing can be easily defeated according to security expert Bruce Schneier.

Use a stolen credit card to buy a ticket under a fake name. Print a fake boarding pass with your real name on it and go to the airport. You give your real ID, and the fake boarding pass with your real name on it, to security. They’re checking the documents against each other. They’re not checking your name against the no-fly list that was done on the airline’s computers. Once you’re through security, you rip up the fake boarding pass, and use the real boarding pass that has the name from the stolen credit card. Then you board the plane, because theyíre not checking your name against your ID at boarding.

Oh and while I’m on the subject of airports, you’ve probably heard they’re introducing security cameras which can see through your clothes.

Further reading: Stop The Panic On Air Security.

If you use the internet, everything you do online is logged and accountable to you. Nothing to fear? Would you want your browsing or email history reviewed by someone, just to prove your innocence? Also remember that many wireless routers either default to being fully open, accessible by anyone, or can be easily hacked. It wasn’t you accessing that illegal-porn site? Prove it.

Maybe you carry a mobile phone. Cell phone locations (and thus, your movements) can be tracked by cell tower triangulation, and the details of each and every call and text message logged.

Database Abuse

The UK has a national DNA database that you can be added to for being drunk and disorderly, or taking part in an illegal demonstration. In fact, anyone who is arrested and detained at a police station, even if they are not subsequently charged with an offence, can be added to the database. The government wants to expand the scope of the database. Tony Blair said in 2006 that he could see no reason why the DNA of everyone should not ultimately be kept on record. In early 2007, five civil servants were arrested on charges of industrial espionage for allegedly stealing DNA information from the database and using it to establish a rival firm.

David Davis said it best during his resignation speech in 2008

“We will have shortly the most intrusive identity card system in the world. A CCTV camera for every 14 citizens, a DNA database bigger than any dictatorship has, with thousands of innocent children and a million innocent citizens on it. We’ve witnessed an assault on jury trials, that bulwark against bad law and its arbitrary abuse by the state, shortcuts for our justice system that make our justice system neither firm nor fair, and the creation of a database state, opening up our private lives to the prying eyes of official snoopers and exposing our personal data to careless civil servants and criminal hackers.

The state has security powers to clamp down on peaceful protests and so-called hate laws which stifle debate, while those who serve violence get off scot-free.”

As databases of personal information grow, it’s inevitable that data will be lost, stolen, sold or used for purposes other than it was intended. People also find ways around the system, such as vehicle license plate cloning, onion-router browsing, disposable mobile phones, the list goes on and on.

Exactly which airport security measure would have prevented the ability to assemble, mid-flight, a fake-bomb like the ones suspected to be used by 9/11 terrorists?

Back in 2008, I created a petition on the UK Prime Minister’s website, asking the Government to clarify it’s position regarding photography.

Through history, we have documented the world around us, whether through written word, art or photography.

Photography in particular has provided fantastic insights into the past and present, and is a hobby enjoyed by millions of people worldwide.

But today, it’s becoming increasingly difficult to take photos of our surroundings, particularly in cities like London.

In recent years, the price divide between professional and consumer equipment has blurred, and it’s quite common these days to see amateurs and hobbyists carrying around tripods, SLR cameras and a backpack full of equipment.

Yet, we are constantly harrassed by security guards and police officers in the name of preventing terrorism. They seem to be operating under a different interpretation of the law to the rest of us, believing that somehow the length of your lens, or size of your camera is relevant.

We would like clarification by the goverment on the law regarding photography of buildings and landmarks from public locations.

The petition received over 5000 signatures. The Government’s response?

There are no legal restrictions on photography in public places. However, the law applies to photographers as it does to anybody else in a public place. So there may be situations in which the taking of photographs may cause or lead to public order situations, inflame an already tense situation, or raise security considerations. Additionally, the police may require a person to move on in order to prevent a breach of the peace, to avoid a public order situation, or for the person’s own safety or welfare, or for the safety and welfare of others.

Each situation will be different and it would be an operational matter for the police officer concerned as to what action if any should be taken in respect of those taking photographs. Anybody with a concern about a specific incident should raise the matter with the Chief Constable of the relevant force.

In other words, no clarification at all. They’re saying “it’s up to the police”. Well that, unfortunately, is our problem. The petition was an attempt to draw attention to the fact that the police are stepping beyond their remit.

But, that was a year ago. Have things changed?

Despite some clarification by the Metropolitan Police, photographers are still being harassed in large numbers.

Today, photographers will be making a stand at Trafalgar Square for a mass gathering in defence of street photography.

Following a series of high profile detentions under s44 of the terrorism act including 7 armed police detaining an award winning architectural photographer in the City of London, the arrest of a press photographer covering campaigning santas at City Airport and the stop and search of a BBC photographer at St Pauls Cathedral and many others. PHNAT feels now is the time for a mass turnout of Photographers, professional and amateur to defend our rights and stop the abuse of the terror laws.

Andy, David and myself will be making the trip up there, and we’re hoping there will be many more.

If you can’t make it, you can follow the action on Twitter (#phnat / #mpg) and Flickr.

Update: Post Gathering Report

Well, it’s safe to say there were a few of us there. Everyone was really nice. There was no trouble at all, just lots of people making themselves heard by their presence.

As if trying to add weight to my earlier points, this absolute gift of a headline in the Guardian today on the very same day of the protests.

CCTV in the sky: police plan to use military-style spy drones

The opening quote tells you all you need to know:

Police in the UK are planning to use unmanned spy drones, controversially deployed in Afghanistan, for the “routine” monitoring of antisocial motorists, protestors, agricultural thieves and fly-tippers, in a significant expansion of covert state surveillance.

Also worth noting is that on the same day photographers try to make a point about not being terrorists and not being wanting to be treated with suspicion, the government raise the terror alert to “severe” to remind everyone else that we should always be afraid of terror, and should be even more vigilant than before.

A more suspicious mind might have called shenanigans on the timing of that announcement. I’m not going to go there, though. My tin foil hat is already showing.

Single Speed Bike vs Geared Bike

I’ve been getting back into cycling in a big way in the last few months. I hate exercise in a big way, but biking used to be a passion of mine, and this past summer I rediscovered the bug.

I ride for two main reasons; fitness and fun. Until now, my ride has been a Specialised HardRock XC, which is a great all round bike for road and off-road, but increasingly, I’ve found something missing from the experience.

Specialized HardRock XC

I began to realise that I missed the simplicity of the BMX I had during my early years. Geared bikes are great for going up exceptionally steep hills, and for getting maximum efficiency from your pedalling, but you don’t realise how much effort is wasted through constantly changing gears, and how much additional weight is carried by the deraileurs and extra chain rings, not to mention the additional complexity of maintenance and repairs.

I know this, because I recently bought a single speed Trek Soho S in an effort to recreate the simplicity of the single speed BMX, combined with the refinement of a road bike.

Trek Soho S
(notice how uncomplicated the rear wheel is, in comparison)

I can safely say, I have not enjoyed riding a bike so much in years. I rode further and faster than I have managed previously, and was less tired at the end. The narrower tires help, as does the lighter weight and decreased drag, but mostly it’s the inability to change gears which totally changes the way you ride (for the better).

Update:

For anyone who’s interested, here is the bike that started it all for me, one christmas back in the early 80’s.

Norco Spitfire – circa 1984

God I miss that bike, although I think my BMX days are long past.

Years later in my mid-teens, I bought a Trek 830 Antelope. A mountain bike of some substantial weight, but which I loved dearly and plan on resurrecting from the garage at some point to restore to its former glory (perhaps with the addition of a front suspension fork and some stupidly fat tyres, for the sake of variety.

My Desktop Tour

I figured as I’ve been interviewing everyone else about their desktops (some of the interviews haven’t been published yet), I thought I’d do one of my own as well, but instead of write a lengthy post about it, I decided to do a video instead.

Update: Yes, I say “pimped up” instead of “pimped out”. That’s just how I roll, mofo.

iPhone Annoyances

The iPhone is a pretty amazing piece of kit, but it has some annoyances which bug the hell out of me.

1. Why is it so complicated to add a new ringtone. Why can’t I simply choose a song from my iTunes library?

2. Why am I unable to add new text message sounds at all? The default ones are awful.

3. Why can’t I hide icons I don’t use from the launcher? (stocks/weather/itunes)

~~4. Why can’t I forward a text message?~~ (fixed in OS 3.0)

~~5. Copy and paste? How hard can it be?~~ (fixed in OS 3.0)

~~6. In most situations, the camera is pretty dreadful.~~ (fixed in iPhone 3GS)

~~7. Speaking of which.. why is there no movie mode?~~ (fixed in iPhone 3GS)

8. The built in notepad looks like crap. Marker font + yellow paper is cute for about 3 seconds.

Memorable Computer & Video Games

Some memorable games from my past. These videos evoke such nostalgia and happy memories, it’s great that you can find all this stuff on the Internet.

Manic Miner – ZX Spectrum

Super Mario Bros. – NES

Police Quest – PC

Space Quest III – PC

Sonic The Hedgehog – Sega Megadrive

Mario Kart – SNES

The Secret of Monkey Island 2 – PC

Sega Rally – Sega Saturn

Legend of Zelda : Ocarina of Time – Nintendo 64

Wipeout 3 – Playstation

Quake 3 Arena – PC

Hexic – XBox 360

Oblivion – PC

World of Warcraft – PC

8 Mac Annoyances

1. Window maximizing. What is the point of that green button on the top of every window? Why does it not maximize the window to fill the screen, like on every other OS out there?

2. The startup chime. Sometimes you want to use your computer discreetly, or without disturbing others, why does the startup chime not have a control panel where you can turn it off?

3. Window resizing. Why can’t you resize a window from any corner? It seems like a very basic thing to be able to do. For a company that prides itself on usability, it’s downright criminal that you STILL can’t do this.

4. One button mouse? C’mon Apple. This is the 21st century. Get with the program.

5. File extensions and associations. I’ve been using a Mac for 8 years now and I still don’t fully understand how this works. For all it’s faults, even Windows gets this right. For example, I want all txt files to open with Textmate, no matter which program created them.

6. Inconsistent UI. While this is better in Leopard than it has been in the past, there are still tons of apps that just don’t look like they’re sharing the same OS. Take Safari & Preview for example, the toolbar buttons don’t even match.

7. The finder. While I’ve gotten used to the finder now, I still don’t find it as straightforward as it could be. Give me Windows Explorer any day (hell, give me File Manager from Windows 3.1).

8. The keyboard. Ok, fine the @ and ” keys are swapped (for a UK user) but some of the other keys on that thing are just plain weird. Perhaps I’m showing my ignorance here, but why do I need a key labelled ‘§’ more than I need one labelled ‘#’. Sorry, I just don’t get it.

There’s a lot of things that Mac does better than Windows (read: most things) but the list above consists of really basic stuff that simply needs fixing to make the Mac experience complete (IMHO, FWIW).